How To Tame Self Criticism & Beat Body Image Blues In Summer

Summer is here, and hopes are high that it will be a better than average one. This means that many of us will be enjoying outdoor occasions such as barbecues, beach days, and festivals. Maybe you are jetting off for a week or two somewhere sunny, or even planning a longer adventure. 

These occasions are often longed for and can be enormously fun and rewarding, but for some people they can also step up the shame and self-criticism. For example, summer is a time when we are more aware of our body image, and this can lead to our inner critic becoming louder. 

Why haven’t we managed to cut down on sugar or carbs, or step up our exercise routines? Here’s a look at how to keep these unwanted thoughts from spoiling the opportunities for fun and relaxation that summer should bring us. 

Why the summer can be an ego threat

In summer, there’s often more opportunities to compare ourselves to others: we are more physically exposed in lighter clothing; we are surrounded by images of idealised summer lifestyles on TV and in social media; and people are constantly talking about holidays and social events. 

These can be tough if you tend to struggle with issues such as low self-esteem or body image worries. Our brains naturally make constant comparisons with others, and often this is a subconscious process. It’s natural to sometimes make positive or negative evaluations of ourselves in order to maintain our sense of self.

Most of the time, our brains will work hard to protect our egos, and assure us that we are doing OK or even a bit better than everyone else. However, issues such as depression, anxiety or perfectionism can skew our thought processes out of balance. The summer can be particularly threatening to the ego as it can feel like there’s nowhere to hide.

Furthermore, summer can make it more difficult to maintain helpful lifestyle habits such as going to the gym or healthy eating, because our schedules are often thrown out of kilter by holidays and weekends away. Warm nights can disrupt sleep and increase dehydration, and all this adds up to a more sensitive nervous system and worse mental health. 

Why the inner critic doesn’t work

In response to perceived feelings of inadequacy, our inner critic often turns up the volume a notch or two. However, this doesn’t work, because shaming yourself into changing your habits just ramps up the stress levels and guilt. This often ends up driving the behaviour you were trying to change in the first place, such as comfort eating.

It can also set up the trap of binary thinking: if you are not perfect 100 per cent of the time, then you have failed, so you might as well give up. This increases your sense of shame, and self-esteem plunges even lower. 

What can you do instead?

Giving up comparing yourself to others doesn’t mean you need to stop caring about your health and body goals, but you need to make the changes so you are more comfortable in your own skin, not to chase some arbitrary standard of perfection. 

Replace the critic with a more compassionate voice

When you hear the harsh and judgemental voice accusing you of being weak or lazy, pause and consider it in a neutral way. Is it the truth, or the result of distorted thinking? Answer it back as you would a friend, in a calm and measured manner. 

Notice what you are feeling 

When you have a sugar craving or an urge to eat chips or crisps, ask yourself if you are genuinely hungry or if you are masking an uncomfortable feeling. Sometimes, we eat because we are feeling bored, overwhelmed, tired or lonely. 

See if you can meet the emotional need another way

Simply stopping a habit can be tough, so find a more neutral way to meet the emotional need. If you want comfort, talk to a friend or make a cup of herbal tea. If you are stressed, try some breathing exercises or yoga poses. 

For those moments when you are genuinely hungry, stock up your cupboards with healthy foods such as fruit and nuts rather than ultra-processed snacks. 

When to reach out for support

Issues such as low self esteem and changing ingrained habits and thought patterns can be incredibly difficult to deal with alone. Sometimes, true change requires the insight and perspective of a neutral party. At our Harley Street practice we offer hypnotherapy sessions, which can help you to access buried emotions and work towards lasting change.